Jumped

My heart was broken so badly that I jumped at the opportunity to fill the whole where my heart once set.
I jumped at the opportunity to give my love to another.
I jumped to dull the pain previously left.
Blind and deaf I dumped into a cicle of deception, and lust, manifesting my feelings for one onto the other.
I jumped into an illusion, into a lake of shallow feelings, for both of us were rebound and doomed for destruction.
I jumped in so deep it is hard to tell which love I mourn for. I'm drowning with feelings yet, I know not why I cry, or whom I cry for. Rejection and loneliness got the best of my heart and I jumped; I jumped to the death of my soul...

A Prayer

I shall pay the taxes my government believe's due to them.
I shall turn back toward you when defiled by men.
I shall see the person before me, as they truly are; rather than seeing what I wish to see. And I shall smile effortlessly, as they precieve to deceive me.
I shall turn my cheek, and forgive all whom have, and may trespass against me.
I shall not intentionally do harm to others as I would have them do unto me. Nor, shall I judge, least I be judged by the highest court of authority.
I shall be compassionate, and understanding of the blind whom surround me.
I shall give the last dollar in my poket to the begger standing on the street.
I shall take the slanders and persecutions that may be pressed against me.
I shall live humbly, and share with my sisters and brothers of Eve.
I shall wait for the One, a man of your word; to help build your kingdom in the physical world that surrounds me.
I shall wait for the One, a soul of your word; to enter into your kingdom above, with me.
I shall give your word, as it has been given to me; and those whom seek you shall find you within themselves, and within me...

Invited Pain

Fooled once again.
Bamboozled once more.
Sometimes I wonder- do I do this intentionally? Do I do this to myself?

Although, this time something's different.
No tears fall from my eyes, and the pain within my heart is dull.
A familiar pain, a pain I know all too well; a pain buried deep in my heart.
A pain once so sharp, now dulled to a creeping ache.
A pain once so unbearable, I could take to my bed for days; and now the pain is so familiar- it barely changes my day-

Perhaps, I invite this pain, to give meaning to my craft.
Charging in knowing, I'll only end up back here-
With only a broken heart, and my dexterity to hold me near...